Despre iertare si incredere – Kris Vallotton
1- victims don’t feel like they can forgive a person because they think it means they will have to trust them again. That’s not true. For example, if a woman is raped she must forgive the man (or bitterness and hatred will destroy her) but she NEVER has to go into a dark alley with him.
2-victimizers often feel like once they ask for forgiveness people are obligated in Christ to trust them. Sorry, that’s not true. Trust is earned through faithful repetition not forced obligation. Often regaining trust is a slow process that can a long time to recover. For example; if you cheat on your spouse it can be years before they ever chose to extend the same level of trust to you that you enjoyed before your fall. If you repeat your unfaithfulness after you asked for forgiveness, (without a miracle), they would be foolish to ever trust you again but they still must forgive you.
Remember the level of your trust for someone determines the depth of your relationship with them. So think long and hard before you betray someone, lie to people, or act without integrity…you could end up isolated in a freezing cold environment; disconnected from the hearts of people as they brace themselves for your next lie!